My Killing Is Up For Review Soon (By Some Posh Fellas) And They Can't Give Me The Advantage Of Communication Cos I'm So Deadly, Apparently.

Subject: All sorts.
From: Mick Scanlon
Date: 27-Dec-03 18:07:37 EST

Hay again Folks. Happy New Year. And a very special Happy New Year to my Fave Family, The Cowells who want me killed so that attention as to why i was killed will get them off the Hook (possibly). I genuinly don,t like the idea of any of them being killed anyhow. We all think about revenge in a big way but the reality is often something we don,t want deep down.

Well i just got back from three days away for crimbo and got rid of that awful being watched feeling i live with 24/7 and its simply amazing the amount of energy it saps from me thinking that i maybe am being watched.
In fact it near kills me.

This of course is designed to make me crack and if it gives anyone any satisfaction then don,t worry, sometimes i feel i,m going too.

Anyhow, my killing is apparently up for review soon (by some posh fellas) and they can,t give me the advantage of communication cos i,m so deadly, apparently.

So lets see. I have plans to begin putting together some abstract paintings soon. They,ll take a good while and i hope to release em to the general public around summer so be watching out for them. Its gonna take me ages to get to grips with re-learning painting techniques. My brain still is far from functioning the way it used too so allthough on the surface i seem relatively okay i,m actually not the full quid at all. Nice.

Using guilt there was a kick ass move and whoever thought of it deserves full credit.

I got a top review from work before crimbo and hope things continue the way they have been. Its great getting a normal life back again. I still think of siobhan most days for what its worth and i,ll allways love her even though we never properly met, i,d love to see her fulfill her dreams deep down, the ejit i am . As it turns out i can,t go with a girl anyhow and haven,t off course. My state of mind is such that it would be a very stupid thing to attempt anyhow, i really am good for nothing in that area. The truth is i don,t really want to anyhow, you have to remember i see below the surface and most of the time its scary. F,E,A,R, for everything a reason.

I work in a mad enviroment and if you combine that with a external focus its not funny.

So as you can probably tell my confusion is still quite strong. It gives others the advantage.

My mind is still open as to how, why, and for what reason the whole thing happened, but thankfully the advantage of working again is that you can forget about it. I also won an X-Box at work and that helps me to forget as well (Halo is tops). Also i think that the basics of learning to paint again helps my brain to begin thinking in terms of processes again which i have not done for ages. So anyhow i,m knackered for tonight. Happy New Year.

Full respect to James. I bought the DVD of Getting Away with it, Live and its simply wicked.

By for now.

Loads more to talk about and i,ll make my postings more frequent i hope, from here onwards.

Good Health and Long life to All.
Mickster